And now, the gifts for the folks who truly have everything — the ones with commas and extra zeroes in their bank accounts. Or maybe you’re the one with a little extra scratch this year and feel like spreading the joy (or showing off) with something gloriously over the top. These are the top-shelf, high-octane presents that’ll raise eyebrows and pulse rates. Most of them can actually fit under a tree. Some can’t… but that’s half the fun.
Think of this list as the “formal” chapter of the holiday season — the equivalent of those college parties where you’d stuff yourself into a tuxedo, promise your date one good picture, and promptly lose both the bow tie and the jacket before midnight. You know, back when life felt like a black-tie event with a twist of chaos.
This is that same spirit — just dressed up for adulthood. The items here are elegant, indulgent, and entirely unnecessary in the best possible way. They’re for the collector, the connoisseur, the man or woman who has run out of excuses not to treat themselves.
So pour a drink, cue the Bing Crosby playlist, and prepare to browse the sort of gifts that make Santa’s sleigh look under-equipped. These are the dream pieces — the “if you know, you know” kind of luxuries — guaranteed to make even the hardest-to-shop-for smile.
From Top Left:
1. Rolex Cosmograph Daytona: With the light blue face, this is a perfect vacation watch for (specifically) the Caribbean.
2. Raven R470 Crossbow: It’s strange how many times I wish I had one of these on the ready. Scratch that itch…
3. Ball and Buck Pheasant Head Stopper: The perfect (arranged) marriage of taxidermy and alcohol. Cheers.
4. Tiffany & Co. Sterling Silver Popcorn Bowl: Just throw it in the dishwasher after you are done.
5. Alanui Cardigan: Because winter and lay-off season get a little chilly. Put something on that will lessen the stings.
6. Tom Ford Wallet: It’s a flex to carry a wallet that cost more than the cash that you carry (I mean, does anyone carry cash anymore?)
7. Sterling Silver Ketchup Sleeve & Lid: I think this would be GREAT for the kids, but I wish they had a version for Ranch Dressing.
8. Loro Piana Cashmere/Silk Sweatpants: The official Zoom call uniform for 2022.
9. Louis Vuitton Painted KeepAll 60 Duffle Bag: It says “whoever steals this is a proud American”.
10. Lucchese Baron Alligator Boots: Watches one episode of ‘Landman’.
11. Blade + Bow 30-year Bourbon: I mean, this is pretty cool regardless of your tax bracket. Just don’t mix it with Diet Coke.
12. Polaris Ranger: While I appreciate the golf cart lifestyle, why not upgrade to something a little more ‘street legal’ (aka your college girlfriend’s alter ego). It’ll fit all the kids, the bag for the pool, and have extra room for the shame you’ll bestow on those Club Cars you wizz by.
What did I miss?
